Dear Annie: I have a crush on my 18-year-old co-worker, and I’m certain she has a crush on me, too — even though I’m 42 and she doesn’t know my age yet. The age gap is too big, which makes me afraid to ask her out because I don’t want to ruin my friendship with her.
The last time I had a relationship with an age gap this big was with a 19-year-old woman when I was 33. Before that, I had a relationship with a 45-year-old woman when I was 25.
I’m not sure what to do. Transitioning our relationship from friendly co-workers to something possibly romantic is a huge step for me. But there’s a new movie coming out soon that I know she’s excited about, and it seems like the perfect chance to ask her out. But is it worth risking the friendship? And possibly complicating things at work? — Age-Gap Gambler
Dear Age-Gap: It’s important to remember that along with this woman’s young age comes a much different phase of life than the one you’re in. Your dating history makes you much more equipped than her to handle a relationship with such a significant age difference — and that’s assuming she is even interested in one.
A meaningful friendship can be just as, if not more, valuable than a romantic pursuit. It’s not impossible for this to eventually blossom into something more, but for now, I’d play it safe and focus on enjoying the friendship you two have built.
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