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Miss Manners: I hosted a dinner for friends and was shamed for my ingredients

Miss Manners: I hosted a dinner for friends and was shamed for my ingredients

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Am I the one who is in the wrong here? When I invited several friends to dinner recently, I was shamed and criticized about what I was serving.

One of my friends invited another guest to join us, and it turns out he is a very strict vegan. I wasn’t even aware that he was coming.

Prior to dinner, this fussy/picky guest realized that I was serving chicken with orange sauce and a dab of honey. He then opened my refrigerator and said, “I see ricotta, buttermilk, cottage cheese, milk, mozzarella, half-and-half, butter and heavy cream!” Then he slammed the door shut and remarked, “Someone needs to teach you how to shop more humanely!”

What’s wrong with me and my shopping? Or should I cultivate new friends?

GENTLE READER: Other than your having a clear affinity for dairy products, Miss Manners sees nothing wrong with your shopping.

But there is something terribly wrong with a friend who brings an uninvited guest, especially one who openly criticizes the host and the food. Guests can make their more extreme food preferences known, if asked — but that would require that the guest be asked to attend the dinner in the first place.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, [email protected]; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

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