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Saturday, November 16, 2024

The in-laws’ house is crowded, the son-in-law loses his privacy

Greetings to the readers of this column.

What do you think if a moderately large house is inhabited by seven families who already have children? Cool isn’t it?

Yes, that’s what I live by every day. I am a newly married wife and my marriage is almost a year old.

My husband and I had to live at my in-laws’ house since we didn’t have our own house yet.

If I follow my heart, I prefer to live at my parents’ house but because they live in the Belait District and my husband and I work in the city, we have no choice but to live at our in-laws’ house.

The in-laws’ house is crowded, the son-in-law loses his privacy
Freepik pictures

To be honest, I don’t have a problem getting along with my brother-in-law and brother-in-law who live in the same house, but the privacy problem is the biggest obstacle for me and my husband.

In addition, the voices of my men who are sometimes noisy make me more stressed especially after coming home from work.

I once wanted to express my discomfort to my husband, but was afraid that he would feel discouraged and think that I didn’t like his family.

This Kami Story column is to some extent able to express my hidden feelings all this time and I would like to get your opinion on what I should do.

Son-in-law Patience

ADVICE DANG MP

Thank you for the sharing that is enough to open the eyes of the readers of this column.

It is not easy to deal with a challenging situation like the one you are experiencing.

Living with in-laws, in-laws, brothers-in-law and children in one house is not only a test of patience, but also the limits of privacy which is really important in marriage, let alone for a new couple.

Perhaps one wise step you can take is to talk gently and empathetically with your husband.

Express your feelings by emphasizing that you do not mean to belittle or reject his family, but rather the need for privacy to build a stronger relationship.

Focus on the needs of both of you as a new couple who need some space to understand each other better, without feeling pressured.

In the meantime, try to find time and personal space for yourself, even if it may be limited, such as taking time outside to relax or doing activities with your husband outside the home.

This approach, to some extent, can help you deal with stress while still appreciating and respecting your husband’s extended family.

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