Asking Eric: Younger neighbors are getting on our nerves

Dear Eric: My wife and I are in our early 70s and live in a suburban neighborhood where every other person has a dog, or so it seems. Consequently, everyone seems to know everyone else.

We’re both in good health but have noticed some of the younger underemployed/remote worker neighbors have become a bit overly solicitous. On one occasion, I left a fence gate open, and one of our neighbors discreetly came by and closed it (we knew it was open – there’s no need to keep the gate shut).

Last week, I had set up a slowly trickling hose to water a tree that has heat distress from a long hot summer. At some point, someone came into a yard and shut the water off. This happened again yesterday.

We’re getting annoyed at what seems to be ageist assumptions about our cognitive health (we are in good shape; I won an Emmy last year). Our neighbors think they are helping, but as we know, “the best intentions oft go awry.” It is frankly getting annoying and feels condescending.

We like our neighbors and appreciate their goodwill, but how can we stop this intrusive behavior?

– Neighborhood Watch

Dear Neighborhood: Congratulations on your Emmy! Can I tell you: it delighted me to no end to read that part of your letter and I’m so glad you included it. Going forward, if a letter writer has won a major award, I would like to know, please. EGOTs, start typing.

Now, to the problem. I think the “dog in the air-conditioned car” method might be useful here. You know how sometimes people will leave their dog in their car when they do their shopping but put a sign in the window that reads “the dog has water, is in AC, and is listening to Led Zeppelin”? This is meant to assure passing good Samaritans that they don’t need to break the window and rescue the dog.

Similarly, if you leave a hose on, you may want to leave a sign near it that reads “Hose is watering the tree; please don’t disturb it.” You can also add “The tree is listening to Led Zeppelin”, if you’d like.

Your neighbors’ helpfulness may be ageism. Or it may simply be misguided enthusiasm. The best way to find out might be to talk to them a little more. You can correct any assumptions they have about your acuity. And, as a bonus, you can casually mention that you have an Emmy.