DEAR MISS MANNERS: We have some friends who regularly host a tailgate party in the parking lot of the college football stadium near our house. We walk to the tailgate, and then go home once the game begins. Hosting this tailgate is “their thing,” and they seem to enjoy being hosts. Our other interactions with these friends center around our young children, and rarely involve a meal as substantial as what is offered at the tailgate. Normally, I would think it rude to try to pay a host for the food and drink we consume. However, given that this is a regular event, and that we are not able to host an event of similar cost and effort to return the favor, would it be appropriate to offer to pay them back for our season-long party attendance?
GENTLE READER: Tell them how generous their tailgating parties are, and ask if there is any — unspecified — way in which you can take some of the burden off of them. When they say they are happy to host, Miss Manners recommends falling back to a dinner invitation that does not involve the children.
(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, [email protected]; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
